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	Schmuck U provides the most advanced and respected program in Schmuckology. The program is designed to prepare students to annoy, manipulate, endanger, and cheat their family, friends, neighbors, and business associates. The graduates of Schmuck U find employment in diverse industries and government agencies. CORE CURRICULUM The Core Curriculum lays the foundation for all other courses, and is required for all students. COR 101 Introduction to Schmuckology Survey of obnoxious and inconsiderate behaviors. Examination of theory and techniques of cheating, lying and manipulation. Special attention to the Carrot Dangling technique. COR 102 Lies White lie, half truth, omission, distortion, exaggeration, unrepresentative example, complete fabrication, tricks of statistics. Detection avoidance: consistency and plausibility analysis; common body language, voice and eye-movement mistakes. Required Reading: How to Lie with Statistics, Darrell Huff BUSINESS BUS 101 Introduction to Management Establishing power with fear and humiliation. Blaming subordinates for your stupid mistakes and poor judgement. Taking credit for subordinates’ outstanding accomplishments and great ideas. The Not-Invented-Here Syndrome and the stifling of innovative thinking. The Peter Principle and the promotion of incompetent managers. Required Reading: The Peter Principle: Why Things Always Go Wrong, Laurence J. Peter BUS 105 Sales Double talk and fast talk. Developing temporary empathy and friendship with customer to lower defenses. Special emphasis on verbal techniques such as repetition of phrases “trust me” and “to be honest with you.” Bait and switch. Common argument fallacies, including red herring and straw man. Structuring confusing and ambiguous terms of deal. Identifying naive and gullible personality types, and how to take special advantage of them. BUS 201 Intermediate Management Sexual harassment: skirting the law without arousing suspicion. Age, race, gender and sexual preference discrimination: know the law, walk the line. Firing employees using fabrication and Cover Your Ass (CYA) techniques. Retribution in employee reviews. Backstabbing colleagues and spreading rumors to climb the corporate ladder. BUS 300 Contract Law Weasel and wiggle your way out of contracts with ambiguous wording, escape clauses, fine print, and legal gobbledygook. BUS 305 Advanced Management Cheating and misleading customers, partners, contractors , suppliers and investors. The art of false advertising. Creative accounting. Litigate, don’t innovate: using litigation, instead of innovation, to destroy competition. PSYCHOLOGY PSY 101 CHILDHOOD DEVELOPMENT Prepare children to be future adult schmucks. Cutting in line. Verbal and physical bullying techniques. Teasing and taunting classmates. Cheating on tests: pre-test preparation, and real-time cheating. Required Reading: The Cheater’s Handbook: The Naughty Student’s Bible, Bob Corbett PSY 102A RELATIONSHIPS FOR MEN ONLY Trading love for sex. Types and methods of abuse. Strategies for neglect. Manipulating a women’s emotions. Exploiting a woman’s weakness for Mr. Wrong, and belief she can change him. Juggling relationships with multiple women. Required Reading: How to Juggle Women Without Getting Killed or Going Broke, Stefan Feller. PSY 102B RELATIONSHIPS FOR WOMEN ONLY Rigorous introduction to gold digging: financial investigation and analysis of personal net worth; places to meet wealthy men; avoiding prenuptual agreements; states and countries with the most favorable divorce settlements. Juggling relationships with multiple men. Required Reading: How to Marry the Rich, Ginie Polo Sayles RECREATION REC 101 Parking Lot Driving Topics include straddling two parking spaces with one car; parking in handicap parking spaces; stealing parking spaces from drivers already waiting for those spaces. Also covered is double parking to block in cars parked on the street. REC 201 Intermediate Auto Driving Principles and methods of aggressive and dangerous driving. Honking and hand gestures expressing anger and frustration. Lane changes without warning. Why yellow means go, and red means go faster. Driving the wrong way on a one-way street. Blocking cars from exiting the highway. Weaving in and out of traffic. Tailgating. Driving while distracted--makeup, cell phones and food. Driving while intoxicated, and methods to try to stay on the road. Beating sobriety tests. Targeting pedestrians in cross-walks. Physics of speeding (knowledge of calculus helpful, but not required). REC 301 Field Study in Auto Driving Prereq: a grade of B or higher in REC 201 and permission of instructor. This course encourages real life driving experience on roads in Boston, with some of America’s worst drivers. Students are expected to practice endangering the lives of both drivers and pedestrians. Course fee includes rental of insured automobiles, but does not include alcoholic beverages. SOCIOLOGY SOC 101 Neighbor Relations Selecting barking dogs, wind chimes, early morning construction and yard work contractors, and other noisemakers. Introduction to environmental science, including the piling of garbage, and the spraying of lawn pesticides toxic to children. Special topics for apartment dwellers: slamming doors, thumping beds, late night parties, and stereo speakers with booming bass. Required Reading: Neighbor Vs. Neighbor: Over 400 Informative and Outrageous Cases of Neighbor Disputes, Mark Warda